Barely To Survive.

It has been a long holiday since my graduation. Spending time with watching tv series, surfing internet, hanging out with friends and doing my must-do daily routinities have already been done until collapse. Talking about where to pursue my studies. some have entered their University and some are still staying at home or maybe having work out there and just waiting until their time to go to University. Meanwhile, I am still here confused with what should I really take. Frankly, this is the discussion that I hate the most. I have kept this problem in myself and I just can not bear this anymore. So I decided to share it here. I have been in this situation after finishing my school. At first, I was asked to just stay at Medan to pursue my studies. I do not know what the aim of that by my parents. I feel like why I must? While I still can get a better one. So I tried to argue the statement in soft way. Soft way means do some discussions. So I offered myself to have studies abroad by telling them cities that I want to. A few days past, my parents had a phonecall with me, because I was far away from them, and they told me if you want to study abroad, you only may go to Singapore, and no Australia, she said. In that situation, my Mom and I were already opposed. She insisted to just stay in Medan, while I insisted to study abroad. At last, my Mom was haggard to keep on arguing with me, so she let me go(I knew she did not really let me go.) So that means Iwas allowed to go abroad but not with the support of parents. Nowadays, I keep on hearing about the difficulties in earning money and finding jobs. I think how if I have already spent the money, and I will end up nothing? Fear indeed ruled my mind. I was about to move on that time, but after thinking I have to waste that bucks, I wonder where can I earn those bucks someday. Which is THICKER THAN EVER!!! I am still thinking, if I decide to stay in Medan, surely I do not have the "appetite" to study. Even I do not know if I will have the "appetite" when I go to foreign country. But I have to promise to myself to bone up hard in there. I decided to study there because I do not want to be trapped in this country. High criminal rate, get the low currency, high liability rate which increases annually, and also famous with the corruption, these all describe the country. And I wish to have a better studies, which has the international certificate and is accepted in other countries. I am still dilemma whether having in Medan or in SG is better. Because My Parents would like to spend those money only for my studies which they have earned hardly. Mmm.. Commiting suicide is the best way, no? Ahhahhaha, just joking. H.